Apparently, according to my Facebook page ever so kindly sharing my memories, it has been 6 years today since I started this blog. And tonight I almost had a panic attack because I couldn't find it. But I did. And that's not what I am here to write about anyway.
Today is August 8. At least for 10 more minutes as I begin this post. It is my first anniversary. It's been a great day - we stayed at the haunted Jean Bonnet Inn in Bedford last night and I spent the night simultaneously hoping for, and praying against any kind of paranormal activity. That's kind of a lie - I was mainly praying against it and literally sweating that my prayers weren't going to work. But I did think it would have been kind of cool if in the morning something had been misplaced. I wasn't up for any of the common stories - window shutters (indoor) being banged in the middle of the night, or voices and chilling laughter or the rocking chair starting to rock. And today we putzed around Bedford Springs Resort like we owned the place - and we didn't even have a room. That was fun. But that's not what I am here to write about either.
It was the planning and executing what took place a year ago - the simplest of simple weddings that ever was to be. Except it wasn't. Roll back to 3 years prior when we started talking about getting married. We both had always wanted a beach wedding. So that was decided - we were going to steal away to a tropical island and get married on the beach. The guest list - at most - would be possibly some of our kids - and maybe a couple of my sisters. So we set a date for May 19th, 2014. And then we found out that a grandbaby was on the way, due May 15th. Then we found out that baby was 2 babies. Which seriously broadened the window of arrival, for which we didn't want to be out of the country. And finances for such a trip were a challenge. So plan #1 was scrapped. So we talked about August of that same year. On an island. Sans that particular son and now much larger family. But I have an issue with trying to be someplace tropical during hurricane season. And why waste a tropical vacation on a time when it's actually warm at home? And finances never materialized. So plan #2 was scrapped. Over the ensuing months, I eventually acquiesced to something much less involved locally with the thought that our honeymoon could be tropical and we would do a symbolic ceremony on the beach - because the red tapes that must be jumped through on islands were ridiculous - minimum number of days on said island before getting married, needing a costly "official" translation of divorce decrees from English to Spanish then marriage license from Spanish to English - or even having to fly your clergy person from 1 island to another to fill out paperwork then back to the island of the ceremony. No thanks.
WHEN/WHERE/HOW So, having given up the dream (how dramatic) of the idyllic beach wedding (at one point I wailed, "Why don't we just go to the courthouse in blue jeans and a T-shirt if we're giving up on everything we dreamed of?"), we decided on a local Bed and Breakfast, which is close to a lovely park with ducks and a gazebo. The B & B, several months before had told us they specialized in small weddings, the wife would even play the piano, and the husband would prepare a wedding dinner for the couple and up to 8 guests. Sounded perfect - we could have the ceremony at the park with the B & B as a back up for inclement weather - and a meal for all of us - then we would stay there. So we booked the room. And we set a date for August 8 - having attempted to try one more date - this time for May 27th - only to find one son couldn't make it and I had to work that week because of all the lost school and client income due to all the snow that winter. Joe had taken the week off in prep, but eventually got called back into work. So a new date was set - one big thing off of what was supposed to be a stressless wedding planning list. I was to leave for a mission trip the 3rd week of July. We had not heard back the confirmation that would make me comfortable from the B & B so I suggested about a week prior to my leaving that we stop in. Took at least 15 minutes for anyone to come to the door. She was NOT happy to have us pop in. And in the course of conversation broke the news to us that they no longer did weddings because they had had a bad experience about 2 weeks before. I'M SORRY - WHAT???!!!???? Our room was paid for, she had emailed with Joe about a wedding dinner menu and NOW they're telling us we can't have a wedding or meal there? AND - if I were to use my PAID FOR room to get ready before the ceremony, which would have been an hour before check in time, I would have to pay extra to do it? AND - she couldn't have kids at a dinner because of a bad experience a few weeks ago....and "everybody says their child is well-behaved" when we assured her that it would be a ratio of 6:1 adults to child with our granddaughter. UGH Then later in the afternoon we get the call from the husband that he can't do the dinner for any of us because it would be too close to check in time. Hmmmm Sally not happy. (The thing that gets me most is that apparently they were never going to tell us they were reneging on their promise. Not a good business plan.) So I leave Joe in charge of finding us a new inclement weather venue, and a new place to have our kids and us for dinner and I trot off to Virginia to lead a corn gleaning event. Aren't I nice?
IN THE MEANTIME: Once we set a date, I started looking for an appropriate dress. Tough to do with body issues, older bride, not a first-time bride, limited finances, and severely limited time. (Why on earth they tell a bride she needs a minimum of 9 months for a gown to come in is beyond me) I didn't want to look like a blob of whipped cream trying to appear 30 years younger but neither did I want to look like a grandmother of the bride - which is what a lot of "consultants" wanted to put me in. Then there was the shoppe that kept bringing me things that looked like they belonged on My Big Fat Greek Wedding. There were more plastic jewels on those dresses than you would find in 10 dollar stores combined. I spent many nights into the wee hours of the morning poring through Modcloth, and countless online knock off bridal sites. And I was scared of those. Finally, a friend said she would make me something. So we shopped for lace and patterns and found nothing in the latter. We did purchase some lace trim just in case. So we got together and outlined a skeletal design. She was leaving for the beach. When she got back I would be gone for cornland. Plan: Meet when we both got back and do this thing! I shopped online, again til the wee hours, for lace. Ordered it to come in from China. While I was away on my trip, her posts about her daughter's health were concerning. She eventually ended up in Geisinger - my friend was told to expect "at least a week." But we didn't lose faith. But I also didn't want her concerned, so as I was on grandkid duty immediately after my corn week, my DIL and I were again combing websites. Except now I only had a week and a half. And things from that mystical interweb have a tendency to come in under size. And maybe looking a heck of a lot better on the size 2 model than on a real person's body. (My apologies to anyone reading who may wear a size 2. It's kind of a #sorrynotsorry kind of thing for me. ) New plan - head to David's Bridal in Harrisburg on my way home and look at their "off the rack sale". Which has never ever ever been anything with which I've had success. Immediately in the door, I was "greeted" by Madam Snark. Who snorted and huffed about filling out a profile when a sales associate whisked me way. We found 3 dresses that actually closed on my body and didn't look like a 19 year old cream puff. But one was taffeta - for August? I don't think so. Another was approximate 6 sizes too large - more altering than I wanted to slam on my friend given the circumstances. Madam Snark is still at this point, nipping at my heels. I settled on the 3rd. But it didn't have lace. I wanted lace. Got it home - my friend came over, zipped it up and the whole zipper head popped off. We are now at something like T-minus 5 days, and sweating. Her daughter is still at this point, not definitively diagnosed and still very ill but home. She assures me she can replace zippers with her eyes closed. And the lace trim we bought 6 weeks ago will look beautiful edging the neckline and hemline. So now my thing is to find something of color for the dress (another thing in that dream category) and some shoes that aren't stupid. Shoe shopping for me is a near impossibility without any pressures riding on it. So this should be a fun endeavor! :/ Frustration ensues until I give up and decide to wear the shoes from a previous wedding. Except I want them to be snazzy. Of course I do! Because we have less than a week and I am ALWAYS unreasonable when I am under pressure. Remember that most stress-free wedding ever?? My nail gal gives me the coral polish she uses on my feet and I decide to paint the satin ribbon on the shoes to make them "not the shoes from another wedding." And Joe and I run to Altoona - the day before we are to get married, mind you - for something of color for the dress. It's one of those times when I don't know what I want, but I'll know it when I see it. Except I didn't. I settled on some coral-ish fabric roses and we head home - get the roses to my friend and go home for what is to be a relaxed evening. Maybe pack for the wedding trip - which we decide not to call the honeymoon because it's not the tropical island. Die hards, we are! I am on Facebook at about 8:15 p.m. when my friend messages and asks whether I have checked my phone messages. Nope - it's been off most of the day. "What's the problem?" I ask. "I'm need more lace, " she types. It is determined that our options are 1. get more lace or 2. remove the majority of the train. Easier for her is to add more lace. So, ascertaining that the lace place closes in 40 minutes and I live about 40 minutes away (this is Friday and I am praying that they don't close early because of lack of business), I go flying up I-99 - realizing that we bought this lace trim 6 weeks ago, and because this is a surplus place, they may not have any more of it - IF I EVEN RECOGNIZE IT because there are hundreds of bolts of trim there and I have not actually seen my chosen lace in 6 weeks! Stumble in, find the lace, buy it with 1 minute til closing, fly back to State College to my friend's house, lace in hand. I try on the dress with the new zipper. She is calm and reassuring. And tells me that she has to work early the next morning. So at 10 a.m. on Saturday, the dress arrives at my house, via her husband as the speedy delivery guy. And my shoes are painted - a project that got done just around midnight.
ALSO THE DAY BEFORE, Joe and I took a little trip out to the new B & B he had found (needless to say we cancelled our reservation at the other place and insisted that we not be charged the cancellation fee) to find a nice spot to stand to exchange vows. The lady had been sympathetic to our plight and was very gracious in helping us. When we popped in, she did tell us that because they had spent all year working on the inside of the inn, the grounds were not very well kept. We assured her we just wanted a pretty spot to stand - and we found one. It was only in taking pictures later, how right she had been - the flower gardens were somewhat sad looking to say the least. But definitely not the hill to die on!
IN THE END - it was a lovely day. A very humid, central Pennsylvania August day - and apparently the air conditioning in my room at the new inn, which I didn't have to pay extra to change my clothes in, was not working, so my hair was flat despite curling it no less than 25 times. We exchanged our vows under some trees by a cute little bridge at the Inn at Walnut Acres near Bellefonte with both of my sons, all 3 granddaughters, and 2 of Joe's kids, then enjoyed a fantastic meal at The Tavern restaurant (my favorite in this town for over 30 years) and the meal was deliciously topped off by incredible gourmet cupcakes by my friend and co-actor Veronica at Ida's Bakery. I had gorgeous flowers (I didn't even get into THAT fiasco here) and a replica bouquet sits in my living room because they were so beautiful that I cried when they withered and died. We had not told my sisters we were actually doing this for a number of reasons, and I think, and dearly hope, by now they have forgiven me the hurt that caused them.
It's been a good first year. A few curve balls here and there as life is wont to throw. But I do have 2 packages of stunningly beautiful lace that have a world of possibilities before them. And now year
# 2 is officially off and running and without any ghosts to usher its launch.
